Monday, June 25, 2012

Ignorance is Not Always Bliss

But it worked out all right in the end.

When I found out that I was pregnant with quadruplets, I was ecstatic.  I wanted a big family and with my age and our fertility issues, the only way to do this would be to have multiple children at once.  My reproductive endocrinologist warned me that the pregnancy would be difficult and, as I said before, he suggested that I reduce the pregnancy down to one or two babies.

I went home and looked up characteristics of successful quadruplet pregnancies.  Two things I remember was that the mother needs to be tall (I'm just shy of 5-9) and have had a previous full-term pregnancy (I had Gavin the day before his due date).  Oh, and my friend, Katie, got me in touch with her friend, Julie, (through Facebook) who had triplets at 35 weeks.   I thought that I'd be find.

(Anyone old enough to remember the TV show My Three Sons)

As you all know by know, I wasn't fine.  The pregnancy was the scariest roller-coaster rides I've ever been on, which isn't saying a lot, because I won't go on roller coasters...I HATE them.  However, I am writing this as my triplets and Gavin are playing house/barn (Owen insists on being a tiger) in the living room, I'd replay that horrific pregnancy over and over again, because of us, everything turned out wonderful.

Since starting this blog, I've met lots of women whose pregnancies didn't turn well.  I didn't know anyone prior to my pregnancy who didn't have great pregnancies.  Before the statistics were just numbers - not realities.  I'm a "math" person.  I took PhD statistics courses while I was at the University of Chicago.  The numbers should have represented real possibilities to me, if anyone.  But I was looking at them as a mother, a pregnant mother fiercely protective of her babies.

Sometimes, I wonder if I would have made different decisions at the beginning of my IVF cycle, knowing what I know now.  The truth of the matter is that I'll never know.  My heart is bigger, stronger now and I love being a mother.  I don't think I could just throw two embryos away, which was the choice presented to us.  However, maybe my journey and those of other women will help you make the insanely hard decisions that surround infertility and high level multiple pregnancies.

All the best,

Here are links to chapter one of my book:

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